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Puck Hogs Local 242 > PHL242 Blog
Words of wisdom from the minds of Puck Hogs

2/28/2009

Midwest Hockey Tour: February '09

Arrival in Columbus, the arena is fantastic, top notch. The local management sold the NHL well on their arena. Nice civil war theme to the Jackets logo/schwag. Kepi is featured on some iterations of the logo with crossed hockey sticks where infantry rifles would be. Nice touch. Question is: can the team survive? They must make the playoffs and inject some life into these fans and this city. I just learned they are the only NHL city to not make the playoffs, pity. At last I got to play pickup hockey down the road in Dayton, how many states does that make it for me and playing puck? Let me count…eight.

 

Next day is a short flight to Minnesota, via Atlanta; correct, Atlanta. Picked up by local support via Puck Hog network. Off to hotel check in before dinner. Look, it’s the Mall of America, second in the world to the one in Edmonton, eh? Off to drinks/dinner in a quaint St. Paul downtown before game. Beer is good as is salad. Yes, salad in the Midwest = fail.  Worry not, the Midwest will soon have its revenge.

It’s time for Minnesota hockey: ringing the concourse at the Xcel Energy Center is the jersey of every high school hockey team in the state. Minnesota claims to be the “State of Hockey”: the jerseys are our first indication as to why; these people do hockey right, they are the State of Hockey. After the bitter divorce and movement to Dallas, Minnesota is whole again. Only one jersey in the rafters, #1: “The Fans”. Cheesy, yes, but point taken. Can a real Wild goalie take that number if he wants it? Jumbotron shows idyllic hockey scenes of kids through pros playing the great game, button pushing done right, this is the essence of hockey I’ve not seen captured since the Hockey Hall of Fame video of the same ilk.

Final fantastic pregame moment: a youth hockey player adorned in Wild jersey skates to center ice with a matching Wild flag mounted to his hockey stick and plants the standard “into” center ice while the crowd crescendos all accentuated by a dazzling light show. Announcer belts “Your Minnesota Wild!” and the team skates their warm-up laps each player, including the million dollar ones, eventually high-fiving the pint sized standard-bearer. Awesome, well done, State of Hockey. Wild win the game and the home town boys take two-thirds of the three stars of the game. They autograph pucks in the tunnel, skate out and toss them to the crowd. First star Antii Mietinen skates across the rink and toss his to the other side. In Minnesota even Finns do cool things.

 

Next stop, the dairy heartland of Wisconsin. The pond hockey circle team forms up the next morning as the remaining members arrive. We take two Hummer H3s in caravan the four hours to Eagle River, WI. We are an L.A. team after all so must roll as blingy as possible. That and we got them for the same price as the Suburban the rental agency botched. Seven players with hockey gear is a mighty tight fit.

            You’re right budday, it is zen. This is what you feel when you see Dollar Lake on the eve of the tourney. Sixteen mini rinks hewn from the lake bed and defined only by the snow banks that form their borders. The next morning we park on the lake 90% dressed, don our skates and skate to our rink (from the car, did you catch that?). Veterans of last year warned “take everything you’ve learned about playing hockey and forget it”. Skating on this stuff vice an indoor ice rink is analogous to road biking/mountain biking. Very choppy stuff, must keep center of gravity very tight. Watch for skipping pucks, watch your knees bear the shock of all this off-road skating, watch yourself if you dare a full hockey stop. But we are skating on a pond, we are skating with friends, it’s below freezing: we are adding to our collective hockey resumes. The game itself is somewhat brutal and lacks much of the intrigue of “real” hockey. But it’s an outstanding novelty that should be experienced by every hockey player. Two losses, one win (beat the bastards from Detroit) and tourney is over. Even got interviewed by a mini-corder toting USA Hockey reporter. The California flag on our jerseys brought lots of comments and looks. As Glennybits likes to say “We came a long way”.

 

 

Posted at 1:53 PM by Adrian | Permalink | Email this Post | Comments (1)

11/11/2008

2010 Olympic Men's Group Play Hockey Results
Why wait? Commisar Bettman is already kvetching about the Vancouver Games being the last time the pros from Dover suit up on the big ice, so let's just get it over with already. I took the opportunity to look ahead and get the results for you. Let's break it down:
 
Tues 2/16/2010
CAN 6 - NOR 1 : In a laugher, the Canuckistanis roll. Goals by Shane Doan and Dany Heatley in the first two minutes had the Fightin' Vikin's on their heels. Ole-Kristian "Ole" Tollefsen had the lone tally for Norway. Said defencemen Mats Trygg,"It was like an avalanche of sardines. If you know what I mean."
 
US 2- SUI 3 : "Wow" was all Marty Gerber could muster as the "Neutrals" neutralised the Yanks. "They really suck."
 
RUS 4 - LAT 3 : "He score! He shoot!" as Ovie wins it with 23 seconds left in regulation. The Russkies dominated play, but were stunned when 54 years "young" Arturs Irbe stood on his head and kept Russia at bay. "We stunned cause we thought he dead", Ovechkin said of Irbe.
 
Weds 2/17/2010
CZE 3 - SLO 3 : "This time it's personal" was the hype surrounding the group play of the former Czechoslovakia. "Sting of de-unification still hurts us," said Czech captain Jaromir Jagr in his farewell to hockey. "Slovaks get all good vowels, leaxe uz not good letterz."
 
SWE 5 - GER 0 : After scoring  two goals and adding an assist on his brother's tally, Henrik Sedin summed it up with:"This ain't soccer, bitch."
 
FIN 3 - BEL 1: A country overrun with vowels steamrolled the former Soviet republic. Ossi Vaaaanaaneeennn tipped home the eventual game winner at 14:35 of the second. The Brothers Kostitsyn teamed for the Belarusskie goal.
 
Thurs 2/18/2010
SUI 1 - CAN 9 : Sidney Crosby scored his fourth goal on the power play with 3 minutes remaining in the first. A visibly distraught Martin Gerber was led to the dressing room, sobbing silently.
 
USA 1 - NOR 2 : "Wow" was all Patrik "one nut" Thoresen could muster as the "Viking Horde" neutralised the Yanks. "They really suck."
 
SLO 3 - RUS 3 : Alex Ovechkin and Evgenie Malkin accounted for all the scoring for Russia. Slovakia tied it up on the resulting power play when both AO and Malkin were sent off for fighting each other. "Is bad blood between us", stated the superstar Ovechkin. "I've never seen or heard of that before" stated Marian Gaborik of Slovakia. Gaborik injured himself on the bench while watching the fight and will miss the remainder of the Olympics.
 
Friday 2/19/2010
CZE 3 - LAT 4 : "We're a good team. I think those punks from Prague took us lightly" said Janis "Sprockets" Sprukts.
 
BEL 2 - SWE 5: "Have you tried my line of Croc footwear?" asked a triumphant Peter Forsberg. "Provides no ankle support whatsoever. I liked them so much, I bought the company!"
 
FIN 4 - GER 2: Saku Koivu scored twice and threwdown with Dennis Seidenberg. "This ain't soccer, bitch", he could be heard yelling on his way to the penalty box. "Why does everyone say that?" asked a perplexed Olaf Kolzig.
 
Tune in Next Week for more "Scores from the Future"
 
Posted at 10:41 AM by scottmcveigh | Category: General Sports | Permalink | Email this Post | Comments (0)

10/27/2008

You kan't touch a Kep, cuz he's redd hott...
I guess the people who thought this was a good idea never saw the Calgary Flamers video.
 
http://www.nhl.tv/team/console.jsp?catid=2&id=23177
 
 
Posted at 3:40 PM by glennybits | Category: Keps Korner | Permalink | Email this Post | Comments (0)
I'll have the brass ones with a side of fries,please.
Philadelphia,PA - The Scene - Game 3 of the World Series.
 
Ferris: A: You can never go too far. B: If I'm gonna get busted, it is *not* gonna be by a guy like *that*.
 
As all two readers of this blog know, I'm a diehard Philly fan. As both of you may also remember, I recently crashed in a bike ride to cure breast cancer and damaged my knee pretty badly. This is known as the "hooker with a heart of gold" juxtaposition. Now that I've laid a little backstory on ya, let's get into the events of Saturday night.
 
It rained. And by rain I mean Noah would've said,"Oy, gevalt! Enough with the rain already. I get it. You want it floody-floody." Thanks to the omnipotence of TV ad sales, Big Bud Selig said the game will go on. Now your intrepid blogger had three (3) Standing Room Only tickets for the tilt, with bro-in-law and son slated to go. The boy looked at the rain and bailed. Quickly grabbed a neighbor and we were off.
 
I'll fast forward through the 5 hours after arriving and waiting out the rain-delay, at 10:10 PM, we had baseball! Now, as I mentioned earlier, I'm a bit on the gimpy side right now. Standing in the cold and damp enhanced my gimpiness. My neighbor spied some folding chairs stacked nearby and grabbed a couple. Within minutes, a security supervisor tapped me on the shoulder, "Comfy?". "Yes, thank you."
"You can't sit there", said the long arm of the windbreaker law.
"I'm crippled" says I. And rolling up my pant leg demonstrated the ace bandage fortuitously wrapped around said balky joint.
"Oh, well you can go to Ticket Services and maybe they can do something for you" says she.
"Could they come here? It's too far for me to walk." the Grinch lied grinchily.
"Ok, you stay here, let me see what I can do", and took my brother in law's chair and vanished.
A minute later, she returned, "Alright, I'm putting you in the handicap section" and proceeded to lead us to the front row of our level with cushy padded seats. Those ugly plastic ones just won't do.
 
You really can never go too far.
Posted at 6:49 AM by scottmcveigh | Category: General Sports | Permalink | Email this Post | Comments (0)

10/16/2008

An Open Letter to T.J. Simers -LA Times
TJ, I have enjoyed your scribblings this week, the slanders directed at my city bringing mirth and laughter to all who read it. We are all impressed with your ability to remain gainfully employed covering a sport seemingly without ever watching the game. You took a page out of Tom Wise's manual for soup stirring. Well played. My only hope is that you rise above the predictable. Find a new angle. Maybe do some actual research. Here's some actual "facts": The Santa snowball incident - 1968 (that's 40 years TJ, subtract the smaller number from the larger), newsflash - turns out,it wasn't really Santa. It was a 19 year old kid named Frank. We reacted with all due outrage to an obvious imposter besmirching Santa's good name. Trust me, we're cool with Father Christmas. The JD Drew battery toss - wikipedia - On August 10, 1999, in Drew's first appearance at Veterans Stadium in Philadelphia, he was booed loudly, and even had "D" batteries thrown at him by two fans. Yep, it happened, we're not proud of it. No one wants to see that happen. Vet Stadium court - Again from Wikipedia (God Bless'em) - With support from members of the city council, he developed Eagles Court in 1998 in response to a 1997 Monday Night Football game between the Eagles and the San Francisco 49ers. With over 60 fistfights reported at the nationally televised game, stadium violence became an embarrassment for the city. McCaffery presided over the court, which was convened in the basement of Veterans Stadium, and handed out fines or jail time to fans arrested during games. There is not a court in Lincoln Financial. So yupper, there've been a few black eyes on our civic sports pride in the past. You might notice, since you mentioned how the Inquirer linked to your piece, that they have not dredged up all of the bright spots in Smogville's illustrious sporting history. Shall we? From SI - Street party turns violent in L.A. LOS ANGELES (AP) -- Police will ensure the Democratic National Convention is not confronted with a repeat of the fires, looting and violence unleashed by a few hundred hooligans after the Los Angeles Lakers won basketball's biggest prize, the mayor vowed Tuesday. Tsk,tsk, TJ. Hmm, I seem to remember another time you "laid back" SoCal types got a little feisty. What was it again? Ohhh WIKIiiiiiii: The Los Angeles riots of 1992, also known as the Rodney King uprising or the Rodney King riots, were sparked on April 29, 1992 when a jury acquitted four police officers accused in the videotaped beating of black motorist Rodney King following a high-speed pursuit. Thousands of people in the Los Angeles area rioted over the six days following the verdict. Widespread looting, assault, arson, and murder occurred, and property damages totaled one billion dollars. Many of the crimes were gang-motivated or perpetrated. In all, 53 people died during the riots. Wow! 53 people dead. Yikers TJ!! I'm glad I live in "Angryville". But surely that's the only time the peace loving, civic minded denizens of the City of Angels had a blemish on their otherwise perfect record? Right? TJ? What do you mean there was another one? Wiki, can you help me out? Watts Riots refers to a large-scale race riot which lasted six days in the Watts neighborhood of Los Angeles, California, in August 1965. By the time the riot subsided, 34 people had been killed, 1,032 injured, and 3,952 arrested. TJ!! Holy cow brother!! Over 1,000 injuries? Can you imagine what you people would be like out there if you didn't have 300 days of sunshine? I shudder to think of it. Well my friend, let's just be thankful the Philly, um Angryville, papers haven't sniffed this out with the same keen journalistic instincts you have in abundance. Otherwise they might want equal time for rebuttal. Peace and Sports unto you! S.R. McVeigh
Posted at 9:50 AM by scottmcveigh | Category: General Sports | Permalink | Email this Post | Comments (0)

10/15/2008

FPOTS!
First Post of the Season in Keps Korner.
 
Bruce Boudreau is preparing for the new season by getting a new wardrobe and filming ads for one of the local Mercedes Benz dealers (signifying his arrival, I suppose).
 
Meantime, exiled former Keps Koach Glenybits Hanlon is  preparing to start his next head coaching job... in Finland...for Jokerit.
 
Nevermind that Jokerit has one of the coolest jersey logos this side of Le Nordique, this would be viewed by most as a step down. But Hanlon's protect-the-goalie-at-all-costs coaching strategy (which, btw, still wasn't enough to save Olaf the Goalaf's job) and his somnambulent personality might just be a perfect fit in a cold, sunless nation of ice skaters and telekom engineers.
Posted at 11:12 AM by glennybits | Category: Keps Korner | Permalink | Email this Post | Comments (0)
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